actuality.log


Monday, September the 13th, 2004

If there is something such as arbitrarily directionless pure anger, I’m experiencing that state right now. Actually, it isn’t as much anger as it is majorly annoyed. And it isn’t as much majorly annoyed as .. no, it’s rage alright.

The weird thing in all of this is I don’t even know what I am angry about. Instead of feeling free and so on considering I am all by myself now, I feel fishing stifled. It’s like I’m trying so damn hard to get some extremely long and quality alone time, but I’m just constantly being hounded. I don’t feel.. free. I don’t feel in control. I am not at peace.

Summer’s over, and things are hectic at the uni, which believe it or not used to help keep me extremely calm. Now, there are these marathon classes in totally weird subjects (being ambiguous because that’s what chickens do) which make me want to.. I don’t really know. I just feel fishing stupid. And even more angry.

The useless computer issues, lack of stability in not-entirely-honestly-procured internet (long story, again being ambiguous because that’s what chickens do), having to check prices in stores, god awful tasting “store-brand” dew, still hurting and damaged nails from the move, perpetually .. ah forget it.

To top this all off, there is some maniac spam bot thinking that (rather useless anyway) shoutbox is a place people come to read advertisements. I’m leaving, if you’re disturbed or some such, probably this should soothe you, in theory.

You have to believe me when I tell you that’s Madras.

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1 people conned into wasting their bandwidth.