I don’t feel so good. As in, I don’t really know. I’m pretty sure it’s in my head. My stomach’s all knotted up and I just.. I just wasted all day. I’ve been constantly flip-flopping between cockiness and seemingly justified goofing off, and fear and consequent inability to work. It’s pretty annoying, and very taxing. I just want.. no, I don’t even know what I want. I think.. I want something to be able to comfort me right now. So I can get back to real work and not constantly fight weird demons. I have realized, however, that I can’t ever really be a hermit hermit. Which is some good that’s come out of this. I can’t believe how much I craved some, any form of interaction today.
Unrelated, I bought some more stuff for people. V’s lists apart, I bought a relatively sweet camera and some other electronics goodies for my dad. I’m still quite clueless as to what to get my mom, and I’m too tense right now to make something.. thoughtful. It’s not as much clueless as the need to not make/get something lame and impersonal.
If someone went through this sort of thing few days ago for mother’s day, and came up with something, I’m all ears.