actuality.log


Saturday, September the 11th, 2004

I have a very strong belief system. Though I consider myself an annoyingly rational person, I also seem to have unexplainably strong faith in things that don’t necessarily fall under the realm of reason. At times, I am oddly superstitious, and I won’t blame you if you find my antics laughable. For obvious reasons (maintaining a serious tone, if it wasn’t obvious enough), I am not getting into those details. As for the things I am willing to admit however, I strongly believe in things like karma.

Now you might think that’s the sort of thing a poor farmer might tell his child after the kid comes running crying to him and tells him how he has to work so hard on the field all day and go hungry, while rich neighbour girl gets to pig out all day and does seemingly nothing toward it. I haven’t been through an analogous circumstance, and no one’s had to make something like this up to pacify me, but I believe in it. I think I sort of like this concept because of the nature of the global governing “balance law” feel. It’s always consequence. You always get what’s coming to you. You’re always the one in control.

Stuff happens. Computers crash, women leave you, planes crash into buildings… . Some good, some quite bad. Some with reason, some without. You’ve got to be able to relax and deal with it. The world’s been good to me. I’ve done nothing particularly of note in return. I haven’t worked toward anything, but at almost every point things have magically fallen in place without reason. And since I don’t like things happening “without reason”, I will make up a pseudo reason and believe in it very strongly if I have to. I attribute it to karma. I must have been exceptionally good to the world at some point, and I’m reaping the benefits. Actually, it’s not entirely true that I don’t work towards things. I just tend to do it in a rather roundabout way. I’m a gentle, kind, nice, generous, understanding person most of the time to the world, and (but only because?) I expect no less in return. You have a tough exam the next day, you could work real hard on some differential equation you’re not going to solve, or you could spend the day helping an illiterate kid take her first steps on her path to literacy, and hope karma does its bit.

People, black rappers mostly, scream things like – “Don’t fish with me because I’ll fish you (I’m guessing in a bad way)” or something. Now I sing “I don’t fish with the system because I don’t plan to be fished by it”. And actually end up doing “I do fish with the system, but only when I’ve reasoned out to myself I have outsmarted it.”

Which unfortunately translates to, when I feel I have karma to burn, I have no real problems in being evil myself. Hey, I’ve done more than enough good to make up for it sort of thing.

You see, it’s easier to believe in an all-controlling-law, when you believe you control it.

This is a printer-friendly version of the journal entry “Karma, the balance law” from actuality.log. Visit http://emphaticallystatic.org/earlier/karma-the-balance-law/ to read the original entry and follow any responses to it.

2 Responses to “Karma, the balance law”

  1. |lUp says:

    I do like the the first four words of the second last paragraph :)

  2. wahgnube says:

    That’s sort of the problem with reality and individual perception. It’s not as much a problem as a convenient loophole.


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