actuality.log


Monday, April the 19th, 2004

What’s the deal with lose lose situations?

I was at this restaurant at lunch, and this is one of those rather smallish places that gets rather crowded. Anyway, there are these (rather narrow) pathways formed at the gaps between the backs of chairs. At some point of time, when I was not quite lost enough in my meal, I happened to notice this (rather not small) woman who needed to make her way through the (rather narrow) path.

Anyway, point being, I could acknowledge that she couldn’t… fit and move my chair… widening the path? and get cold glared at, for calling her fat without calling her fat. Or I could just sit there and get cold glared at for being an insensitive clod.

Needless to say, I got the cold glare. Sheesh.

Yes, rather is the word of the day.

This is a printer-friendly version of the journal entry “You lose some, you lose some” from actuality.log. Visit http://emphaticallystatic.org/earlier/you-lose-some-you-lose-some/ to read the original entry and follow any responses to it.

8 Responses to “You lose some, you lose some”

  1. Lyzard says:

    Over the past year and a half I have lost 80 pounds. In the past there were instances almost daily when I didn’t fit down an aisle very well. It was always more embarassing for me to bump into things/people than to have them moved out of my way. Not only is it courtesy, but I often find when I bump into things like the back of people’s chairs, even 80 pounds later – I feel like a moose, regardless of if I am moose-sized or not anymore.

  2. anita says:

    tiny little me couldn’t make it past this one woman’s chair today. i said excuse me, hoping she would move her chair, but she was kind of oblivious. so i tried to force my way through – one would think that she would pull her chair in when she felt my butt pushing up against it, but she didn’t. and then i had to get up again to get some water, but by this time, she had pulled her chair out EVEN FURTHER. i couldn’t make it through this time and gave her a really big push so that she would get the hint. but she probably thought i was the rude one.

  3. wahgnube says:

    Lyzard: That’s an extremely large weight loss in that period. I hope that was effected.. healthily. And after listening to your point of view, I think I did the right thing. Maybe her glare wasn’t warranted, or maybe I imagined something I implicitly expected.

  4. wahgnube says:

    anita: She must have been awfully engrossed in her meal (or in her conversation or whatever else it was) because this seems like extremely odd behaviour. Or maybe she has a problem with spatial perception.

    Maybe she over estimated your tiny little youeeness :D

  5. Lyzard says:

    Yes very healthy, under the supervision of my doctor and all that good stuff.

  6. wahgnube says:

    Lyzard: Awesome. Rock on.

  7. anita says:

    she was done eating, and she was alone. i can understand if she didn’t see me coming, or didn’t realize how small the aisle was…but when i’m clearly pushing up against her chair trying to squeeze through, she should have definitely felt that and moved! i was so annoyed!

  8. wahgnube says:

    I don’t see why. Must be “let’s be arbitrarily rude to someone” day.


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