actuality.log


Tuesday, November the 25th, 2003

Ok, before I say anything else, might as well go through the motions and release the next iteration, v0.0.5. If it helps, it’s now trimmed down a bit, and valid XHTML 1.1. Not too much though, from 14 odd KB to about 12 or so? Curses, it was beginning to have all that I wanted, and now I go back and actually read the rest of the person’s site (the place I based this disclaimer on initially) and it turn’s out (s)he doesn’t appreciate it being just copied and pasted. It definitely isn’t copied and pasted, and it is very different now, but I need to hack away until I’m sufficiently satisfied it’s differenter. Curses. I should be more observant. Also, it’s totally unfunny at the moment. Need to do something about that too.

I’ve been spending waay too much time on something I know probably no one is ever going to go through.(Which is where the humour should come in and magically save the day?) It’s just, I don’t know, it’s not like I don’t have tons of other more productive things to do, I guess I am probably playing out some subconscious “I want to be a legal something” fantasy. I don’t know. Or it could be this fascination I have with planning and groundwork and all that. I spend all my time working on the foundation of things, and then I stop. It’s like that’s all I ever needed in these side projects? It’s scary that it’s all that really fascinates me with respect to work and other things in my life too. Understand the theory and what not, learn the tools and all that. Stop. There is no drive to use it and get results. All that planning, fishing TODO lists, getting all the groundwork done, is an end in itself. This bothers a lot of people, including me at times.

Speaking of (being an?) irritant, this clause keeps ringing in my head … there might be a fair degree of ambiguity in interpretation of some of the terms that follow. If such an event occurs, the final interpretation is the way I “meant it”, which I will clarify if requested, no matter what words I used to articulate it …. I think I should have worn this (something similar anyway.. a big bold, “I see the world differently. I talk differently. Don’t get hurt/annoyed. Please ask me to explain. I will.”) sign on my head. Probably my life would have been a lot less complicated. And a lot happier.

Yes, I am pretty proud of the way I tied in that drab document with events going on in my life.

Obviously, my day was quite boring. Boring’s good. It was, expectedly, freezing outside, so stuck indoors. (Not like that’s any different from any other day, but now I have something to blame.) Been trying hard to fall back into a normal “let me “just” handle whatever intellectual hurdle that comes my way” routine. It’s just not as easy as I want it to be. Sleep routine is back. Picked up a new “eat twice day at most and not crave anything” nutrition routine. Everything except what I really want is falling back into groove. If I had “it”, none of these would matter, they’d be automatically fine. Abler? Neededer? Less Needyer?

I don’t know what “it” really is. Or rather, I do, but I can’t word it. Of course.

This is a printer-friendly version of the journal entry “Disclaimers, and life” from actuality.log. Visit http://emphaticallystatic.org/earlier/disclaimers-and-life/ to read the original entry and follow any responses to it.
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1 people conned into wasting their bandwidth.