God, are you out there?

Can you hear me?

Being omniscient and all, you know this recently arrived in my inbox.

Please don’t think that this is just another mail to your inbox. I honestly …

<snip>irrelevant but very positive details inside</snip>

Thanks for your invaluable help (once again!).

The next time someone wants to tell me something like this, please let them do it in person.
Please let it be a ‘her’.
Please let her be moderately attractive.
Please let her be willing to stick around in grad school for more than a year and a half.

When she’s doing this, please let me be gracious and warm and not stammer or attempt thoughtless humour or in any other way embarrass myself.

Please, god.

I don’t ask for much, and I spend so much time carefully helping so many people in ways I know you would find thoughtful.

You owe me.